The weather has interfered with Sam's interview again! He was supposed to head north today and they are getting slammed with more ice/snow so they have finally decided just to do this interview over the phone on Tuesday, instead of in person tomorrow.
The lack of an in person interview may put him at a disadvantage, but we're a bit of the mind that things will work out they way they should, and if he is really meant to have this job things will work out, despite not getting there this week.
So I hope, I HOPE, we will have an outcome on this particular job/moving situation in the next week. Then I can stop holding my breath.
Until the next out of town position is posted.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Thursday, January 1, 2009
And Again With the Changes!
Now Sam's interview isn't January 5th - it's January 12th. Which is good, he'll be around to help unpack after we return from our holiday travels, but it means yet another week of dragging all of this along.
We've also had some random issues with winter driving - nothing bad has happened this trip, but we had a scary black ice skid on the highway coming home last winter. And that, combined with a couple of other scary but harmless incidents has made Sam really, really nervous about driving on snowy/icy roads.
Not that driving on icy roads is a picnic for anyone, but in many parts of the country it is a fact of life.
I don't mean to be a bitch, but if Sam gets this job we'll be moving significantly north of where we currently live and there will be many, many more snowy/ice roads that need driving on. I think this needs to be a serious consideration IF he is offered the job. He has had anxiety issues in the past (serious ones, before we met) and manages stress/worry very well most of the time. But I can see how this driving thing unravels him and I worry about it - not that I wouldn't support him if his struggle with anxiety resurfaced, on the contrary, I think I would help him do whatever needed doing in order to cope, but I have some concerns about totally upended our lives and how he'll really deal with that. And drive in the northern winter.
We've also had some random issues with winter driving - nothing bad has happened this trip, but we had a scary black ice skid on the highway coming home last winter. And that, combined with a couple of other scary but harmless incidents has made Sam really, really nervous about driving on snowy/icy roads.
Not that driving on icy roads is a picnic for anyone, but in many parts of the country it is a fact of life.
I don't mean to be a bitch, but if Sam gets this job we'll be moving significantly north of where we currently live and there will be many, many more snowy/ice roads that need driving on. I think this needs to be a serious consideration IF he is offered the job. He has had anxiety issues in the past (serious ones, before we met) and manages stress/worry very well most of the time. But I can see how this driving thing unravels him and I worry about it - not that I wouldn't support him if his struggle with anxiety resurfaced, on the contrary, I think I would help him do whatever needed doing in order to cope, but I have some concerns about totally upended our lives and how he'll really deal with that. And drive in the northern winter.
Monday, December 22, 2008
On the Road
So Sam's job interview was moved from last Friday to tomorrow. He's on the road, driving north, as we speak.
*****
Okay, I started typing, got called away from the computer, and, after a couple of phone calls, Sam is turning around and driving home. The weather up north is so bad they aren't sure he can make it there and they expect up to eight more inches of snow tomorrow so he might not get home if he did make it today.
New interview scheduled for January 5.
This happened with the last major interview as well - not weather difficulties, but various reasons for rescheduling and pushing things back. Every time I think well at least we'll know something soon, things get postponed. We thought we'd know by the 1st of the year whether we were moving or not, now the interview won't even have happened yet. SIGH.
BUT I'm glad he's headed home now because getting all the rest of the cooking and baking finished before Christmas Eve is daunting enough, but even more so if I'm the only parent here while trying to accomplish those tasks. I'm happy to have backup tonight and tomorrow, even if it does mean more waiting.
*****
Okay, I started typing, got called away from the computer, and, after a couple of phone calls, Sam is turning around and driving home. The weather up north is so bad they aren't sure he can make it there and they expect up to eight more inches of snow tomorrow so he might not get home if he did make it today.
New interview scheduled for January 5.
This happened with the last major interview as well - not weather difficulties, but various reasons for rescheduling and pushing things back. Every time I think well at least we'll know something soon, things get postponed. We thought we'd know by the 1st of the year whether we were moving or not, now the interview won't even have happened yet. SIGH.
BUT I'm glad he's headed home now because getting all the rest of the cooking and baking finished before Christmas Eve is daunting enough, but even more so if I'm the only parent here while trying to accomplish those tasks. I'm happy to have backup tonight and tomorrow, even if it does mean more waiting.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Feeling Sickish Again
Here we go again.
Sam has a job interview a few hours north of here on Friday.
He likes his current job. He is good at his current job. Unfortunately, in his "industry" there just aren't many jobs like his current one. He worries (and in this economy who the fuck doesn't) that some higher-up will eventually decide to cut his position. Now he has been with the same company for many years and would unlikely be altogether without a job if his current position were eliminated, but he may be forced into a demotion to stay with the company. Obviously one proactive solution to this little dilemma is to apply when promotions become open, even in other markets. In fact, because of the geographic make up of his company it is more likely that he'd get promoted in an area outside the one where we now live.
I'm used to Sam applying for jobs in other markets. A lot of the time it doesn't really go anywhere, either because they assume he's too young to be qualified (he is young for the type job he's applying for, but he is qualified) or they really just want to hire from within their own regions. But there have been three jobs within this calendar year where they've wanted to bring him in for an in-person interview, which doesn't happen until pretty far along in the process. The first of these happened this spring, right around the time I ended up in the hospital on bed rest - he eventually declined that interview (duh). Then it happened this summer and he was one of three finalists for a job a few hours south of here. This time the company is comping his miles and providing a hotel room so that he can drive up Thursday night for a Friday interview.
They intend to hire someone before the end of the year, which is good and bad. This go round will be settled within about two weeks. So he'll either not get the job and we can relax and I can stop feeling like I might throw up at any minute. Or he'll get the job and then probably move up there, live in temporary housing, and come here on weekends, until Mary finishes out the school year and we take care of a few areas in the house before putting it on the market. (Oh holy hell, who wants to be selling a house right now?) So I wouldn't have to move in a month, but I'd also become a mostly single parent for the foreseeable future.
On some level I know that it could be very good for us to start over somewhere new. But we would be leaving a pretty incredible support system - Sam's family is here, and very good friends, and after everything we went through this spring I can't imagine how difficult this would be on Mary. I know people do stuff like this all the time, but that doesn't mean I want to be one of them.
The worst part, for me, is knowing that if this job doesn't work out the relief I'll feel will be tempered with anxiety, wondering when we are going to go through this again.
Sam has a job interview a few hours north of here on Friday.
He likes his current job. He is good at his current job. Unfortunately, in his "industry" there just aren't many jobs like his current one. He worries (and in this economy who the fuck doesn't) that some higher-up will eventually decide to cut his position. Now he has been with the same company for many years and would unlikely be altogether without a job if his current position were eliminated, but he may be forced into a demotion to stay with the company. Obviously one proactive solution to this little dilemma is to apply when promotions become open, even in other markets. In fact, because of the geographic make up of his company it is more likely that he'd get promoted in an area outside the one where we now live.
I'm used to Sam applying for jobs in other markets. A lot of the time it doesn't really go anywhere, either because they assume he's too young to be qualified (he is young for the type job he's applying for, but he is qualified) or they really just want to hire from within their own regions. But there have been three jobs within this calendar year where they've wanted to bring him in for an in-person interview, which doesn't happen until pretty far along in the process. The first of these happened this spring, right around the time I ended up in the hospital on bed rest - he eventually declined that interview (duh). Then it happened this summer and he was one of three finalists for a job a few hours south of here. This time the company is comping his miles and providing a hotel room so that he can drive up Thursday night for a Friday interview.
They intend to hire someone before the end of the year, which is good and bad. This go round will be settled within about two weeks. So he'll either not get the job and we can relax and I can stop feeling like I might throw up at any minute. Or he'll get the job and then probably move up there, live in temporary housing, and come here on weekends, until Mary finishes out the school year and we take care of a few areas in the house before putting it on the market. (Oh holy hell, who wants to be selling a house right now?) So I wouldn't have to move in a month, but I'd also become a mostly single parent for the foreseeable future.
On some level I know that it could be very good for us to start over somewhere new. But we would be leaving a pretty incredible support system - Sam's family is here, and very good friends, and after everything we went through this spring I can't imagine how difficult this would be on Mary. I know people do stuff like this all the time, but that doesn't mean I want to be one of them.
The worst part, for me, is knowing that if this job doesn't work out the relief I'll feel will be tempered with anxiety, wondering when we are going to go through this again.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
My Six
Constance tagged me so here I go:
1) I have an almost unhealthy love of /obsession for the television show Friends. I have watched all ten seasons twice through on DVD and I still watch reruns on television.
2) It matters to me what the final taste in my mouth is when I'm eating. I occasionally spend entire meals thinking about which part I'm going to save for that last bite.
3) I'm terrified of most spiders. Earwigs are a close second.
4) I mostly dislike the taste of toothpaste and probably brush my teeth less often than I should because of it.
5) I haven't had a haircut since sometime in 2007. Sad, I know.
6) I keep a notebook in which I write the titles of books I'd like to read. I'm pretty sure there are already twice as many books in it as I'm likely to read in the remainder of my life and yet I keep adding to it.
I officially tag any Constance who wants to play!
1) I have an almost unhealthy love of /obsession for the television show Friends. I have watched all ten seasons twice through on DVD and I still watch reruns on television.
2) It matters to me what the final taste in my mouth is when I'm eating. I occasionally spend entire meals thinking about which part I'm going to save for that last bite.
3) I'm terrified of most spiders. Earwigs are a close second.
4) I mostly dislike the taste of toothpaste and probably brush my teeth less often than I should because of it.
5) I haven't had a haircut since sometime in 2007. Sad, I know.
6) I keep a notebook in which I write the titles of books I'd like to read. I'm pretty sure there are already twice as many books in it as I'm likely to read in the remainder of my life and yet I keep adding to it.
I officially tag any Constance who wants to play!
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
My Hands Are Tied
I'm so easily frustrated in situations where I want to help, but can't.
One of the biggest challenges of having a family, for me, is that I can't run to be with a friend at the drop of a hat. I know that is sort of a no brainer, but I don't think I'll ever stop feeling that frustration.
A very good friend here (let's call her Ellen) called this evening to say her father had been hospitalized. Another friend of hers has been counting on her to help as she just went into labor with twins and has NO FAMILY here. So Ellen is worried about her father, trying to help her other friend, and is obviously suddenly having a very difficult time.
She called tonight to ask if I could sub for her for part of the day tomorrow. I can't in the morning because I'm going on a field trip with Mary's class. I would love to have helped her in the afternoon, but my MIL can't babysit in the afternoon. Sam could get away from work for a couple of hours, but says he rather wouldn't. I feel a little frustrated with him, but at the same time, I can't really blame him for not wanting to take time off work.
Ellen is such and incredible friend to me. She drove to the hospital in a blizzard when I was in labor with Keegan and Sam couldn't get there right away. She held my hands while I got an epidural for goodness sake. She has been truly remarkable in the lengths she's gone to to help me. So I'm frustrated that I can't drop everything to help her.
But this is the life I have and I have responsibilities to my family, my kids. There's nothing I can do for her tomorrow. It's not like there is something I can shuffle to make it work. It is out of my hands. So why do I feel so guilty?
One of the biggest challenges of having a family, for me, is that I can't run to be with a friend at the drop of a hat. I know that is sort of a no brainer, but I don't think I'll ever stop feeling that frustration.
A very good friend here (let's call her Ellen) called this evening to say her father had been hospitalized. Another friend of hers has been counting on her to help as she just went into labor with twins and has NO FAMILY here. So Ellen is worried about her father, trying to help her other friend, and is obviously suddenly having a very difficult time.
She called tonight to ask if I could sub for her for part of the day tomorrow. I can't in the morning because I'm going on a field trip with Mary's class. I would love to have helped her in the afternoon, but my MIL can't babysit in the afternoon. Sam could get away from work for a couple of hours, but says he rather wouldn't. I feel a little frustrated with him, but at the same time, I can't really blame him for not wanting to take time off work.
Ellen is such and incredible friend to me. She drove to the hospital in a blizzard when I was in labor with Keegan and Sam couldn't get there right away. She held my hands while I got an epidural for goodness sake. She has been truly remarkable in the lengths she's gone to to help me. So I'm frustrated that I can't drop everything to help her.
But this is the life I have and I have responsibilities to my family, my kids. There's nothing I can do for her tomorrow. It's not like there is something I can shuffle to make it work. It is out of my hands. So why do I feel so guilty?
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Just A Note
Dear Sam,
I'm upset right now, but not necessarily with you. But the upset I feel is causing me to have this reaction to the fact that you just fed Keegan, put him to bed, and then left the bottle on the kitchen counter:
Learn to wash the fucking bottle!!!
I am not actually screaming this at you because I would be acting with emotion I'm really feeling toward an entirely different situation. It's too bad you don't appreciate the considerable restraint this is taking.
I'm so grateful that you help with the children in many ways. However, not washing those bottles is a lot like your dirty dishes making it all the way to the counter and not six inches lower into the dishwasher. It isn't that difficult. Especially since we use the "drop-in" bottles. Here is what I wish you would learn to do:
1) Take the bottle apart.
2) Rinse and recycle the liner.
3) Rinse the bottle and the ring that holds the nipple.
4) Use the dish soap that is sitting right there next to the sink and some hot water to wash the nipple.
It would take approximately two minutes for you to do all of that each time you feed Keegan. When I have to find it and do it later (or the next morning) it doesn't take any more time, but it does raise my blood pressure because I don't understand why you cannot do it yourself.
I'm upset right now, but not necessarily with you. But the upset I feel is causing me to have this reaction to the fact that you just fed Keegan, put him to bed, and then left the bottle on the kitchen counter:
Learn to wash the fucking bottle!!!
I am not actually screaming this at you because I would be acting with emotion I'm really feeling toward an entirely different situation. It's too bad you don't appreciate the considerable restraint this is taking.
I'm so grateful that you help with the children in many ways. However, not washing those bottles is a lot like your dirty dishes making it all the way to the counter and not six inches lower into the dishwasher. It isn't that difficult. Especially since we use the "drop-in" bottles. Here is what I wish you would learn to do:
1) Take the bottle apart.
2) Rinse and recycle the liner.
3) Rinse the bottle and the ring that holds the nipple.
4) Use the dish soap that is sitting right there next to the sink and some hot water to wash the nipple.
It would take approximately two minutes for you to do all of that each time you feed Keegan. When I have to find it and do it later (or the next morning) it doesn't take any more time, but it does raise my blood pressure because I don't understand why you cannot do it yourself.
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